(edited to add) This is something I received in an email and because I agree with it, I just had to post it.
Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists,Marxists and Obama supporters, et al:
We have stuck together since the late 1950's, but the whole ofthis latest election process has
made me realize that I want a divorce. I know we tolerated each other for many years for the
sake of futuregenerations, but sadly, this relationship has run its course. Our twoideological
sides of America cannot and will not ever agree on what isright so let's just end it on friendly
terms. We can smile and chalk itup to irreconcilable differences and go our own way.
Here is a model separation agreement:
Our two groups can equitably divide up the country bylandmass each taking a portion. That will be the difficult part, but Iam sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that, itshould be relatively easy! Our respective representatives caneffortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct anddisparate tastes.
We don't like redistributive taxes so you can keep them.You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU. Since you hate gunsand war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA and the military.You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore and Rosie O'Donnell (You are, however,responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move allthree of them).
We'll keep the capitalism, greedy corporations,pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart and Wall Street. You can have yourbeloved homeless, homeboys, hippies and illegal aliens. We'll keep thehot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO's and rednecks. We'll keep theBibles and give you NBC and Hollywood.
You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we'll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us. You can have the peaceniks and war protesters. When our allies or our way oflife are under assault, we'll help provide them security.
We'll keep our Judeo-Christian values.. You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism and Shirley McClain. You can also have the U.N.. but we will no longer be paying the bill.
We'll keep the SUVs, pickup trucks and oversized luxury cars. You can take every Subaru station wagon you can find.
You can give everyone healthcare if you can find anypracticing doctors. We'll continue to believe healthcare is a luxury and not a right. We'll keep The Battle Hymn of the Republic and theNational Anthem. I'm sure you'll be happy to substitute Imagine, I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing, Kum Ba Ya or We Are the World.
We'll practice trickle down economics and you can give trickle up poverty your best shot. Since it often so offends you, we'll keep our history, our name and our flag.
Would you agree to this? If so, please pass it along to other like minded liberal and conservative patriots and if you do not agree, just hit delete. In the spirit of friendly parting, I'll bet you ANWAR, which one of us will need whose help in 15 years.
Bitter, Angry, Gun & Religion Clinging American Patriots
P.S. Also, please take Barbara Streisand, Sean Penn, JaneFonda, et al, with you!