Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Mom again

I just read a blog by my nephew's wife about their beloved son who passed away a few yrs ago at the tender age of 4. All of her thoughts I have read before my mom passed away, I felt bad for her, but it didn't really hit me just how much of a loss her and my nephew have gone through until my mom passed away. It's been a yr now and I still have to watch myself. I was watching a show on tv the other night and one of the characters had MS and it hit me. I had to control myself since my husband is not emotional and doesn't understand that I still miss her.

Most days now I'm fine even just thinking of her. But every now and then something will strike a nerve in me and I have to fight it back. I guess sometimes I dwell on her too much thinking that if I don't think of her all the time, I will forget her. But then other times I know she won't be forgotten and I allow myself to just go on. It's what she would want.

So for all of you who read my blog, thanks for putting up with my emotions. They are still pretty raw, but getting better. LOVE YOU MOM!